This Is Probably one of the Best Baths in the world!

There are many, many reasons to take up residence in New York City, but the quality of apartment fixtures does not usually register within the top 5,000. If you are a person who decided to relocate in order to experience the city’s constellation of Michelin-starred restaurants or fabulous, award-winning tap water, the odds are high you have given up at least one of the following: proximity to your workplace; the financial ability to live alone; reliable cable television and internet; more than 10 square feet of personal space; and a bathtub that one can vaguely imagine taking a bath in.

That is why I have only two criteria for vacation accommodations: The first is a nice bathroom with a tub, and the second is everything else. Is this Airbnb a dusty cow barn with wooden shelves for beds, but it comes with a glorious claw foot tub overlooking a grazing pasture? Great, I love it, I will be there for four nights in the spring; I will plan my whole trip around when I can bathe in that tub, and spend months imagining myself in the bathroom, looking out over the cows, soaking my body in warm eucalyptus salts. The best kinds of vacation tubs, of course, are free-standing, because they indicate a bathroom large enough to accommodate a free-standing tub. The worst kinds of tubs are the afterthoughts: No pasture to look at — just some peeling duct tape, an amenity that my grimy Brooklyn bathtub, installed in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, sometime between the settling of New Amsterdam and World War II, already provides me.

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